Harry Kane is actually Superman, pundits conclude

TV pundits are certain Harry Kane is merely a new guise for Clark Kent, aka Superman.

That was the conclusion of the first and only edition of the Ranty Football Show on ITV, which was specially organised just to discuss how good Kane is.

“He’s the absolute Dog’s Bollocks,” said Andy Townsend, “the way he cut across the Huddersfield defenders for that second goal at the weekend is the fastest thing I’ve seen since Superman raced to stop the comet in Superman 4.”

“I think it’s more than a coincidence that a few years after Clark Kent disappears from our screens, Harry Kane emerges,” said Lee Dixon.

“Kane, when you think about it is pretty similar to Kent, so it’s just the kind of alias Superman would use if creating a new identity,” he added.

“So are we 100% certain that Harry Kane is indeed Superman?” asked host Mark Chapman, to nods all around the studio.

A viewer than texted in to remind the pundits that the only thing Superman can’t do is take corners, which confirmed the discovery of Kane’s true identity.

Image courtesy of enviro warrior via Wikimedia Commons

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *