Mourinho late for training after polishing trophy cabinet

Jose Mourinho reported late for training earlier this week, it has emerged, and claimed he had been delayed polishing his personal trophy cabinet.

The Manchester United manager told reporters: “I like to give it all a good spring clean every year. My wife does what she can but there are many, many trophies I have won so it’s always a team effort.

“By the time I gave my eight league title winning medals a good shine, I had to nip down to the shop for more polish for the cups and all those world coach of the year things. There was only time to give my honorary doctorate from Lisbon University a brief dusting.

“Then those Champions League medals are real bastards – you wouldn’t believe how much Mr Muscle I had to use on those.

“I got delayed trying to take the name Real Madrid off my Liga and Copa Del Rey honours – I was hoping to bleach it off somehow, but in the end I had to use a chisel.”

News that Mourinho looks after a packed trophy cabinet came as a surprise to the journalists who remembered his habit of throwing his Premier League winner’s medals into the crowd during his first spell at Chelsea.

The medal that was caught by a fan in Stamford Bridge in 2005 was sold on eBay years later for £10,000 to a user called ‘Happy JM’.

Image courtesy of Aleksandr Osipov via Wikimedia Commons

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