“Our season was a shit sandwich, but now we are spreading Nutella on it”: Carlos Carvalhal

Swansea manager Carlos Carvalhal has compared his side’s turnaround since he took charge to someone scraping excrement out of a sandwich and replacing it with Nutella.

“We are not ready to eat it yet, but we are licking our lips and getting ready to sit down,” said the Portuguese manager at a press conference today.

A journalist then pointed out that it may be unhygienic to eat a sandwich that has had shit scraped out of it, no matter what delight is later added, to which Carvalhal said:

“That is our challenge now. To make a completely new sandwich, one from fluffy fresh bread. Maybe sourdough. Yummy!”

He then spoke about how the Swans could benefit from an FA Cup run by adding: “Sometimes you want a few crisps on your plate next to the sandwich, and that’s great.

“As long as you don’t eat too many before the sandwich, and you offer the crisp bag around, everyone benefits.”

Carvalhal added that he does not expect Renato Sanches to recover from a hamstring injury in time for this weekend’s FA Cup tie at Sheffield Wednesday.

“Renato is orbiting in his space shuttle, but it is very windy down here. He is waiting for the wind to calm down before making his re-entry.”

Image courtesy of Ronnie Macdonald via Wikimedia Commons

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