Sunday league managers bemused as ‘stick a man on Hazard’ revealed as secret way to stop Chelsea

The nation’s Sunday league managers were puzzled today after reading that Jose Mourinho has revealed to the world that the secret of stopping Chelsea lies in man marking Eden Hazard.

Manchester United’s astute tactics in their 2-0 win yesterday came after 31 Premier League matches in which various strategies have been tried – and mostly failed – to stop Antonio Conte’s side.

Most Premier League bosses had tried until yesterday to either get their players to dribble past N’Golo Kante, tickle Diego Costa under the armpits, or approach Chelsea as Arsenal do, by saying: “Why stop Chelsea when they have to find a way to stop us first?”

Tom Wilson, the player manager of Ugly Scuffers, a Sunday league team in the Southeast Lancashire Seventh Over 35s Division, said:

“Putting a lad on Hazard would be the first thing I would try, so I’m surprised none of the other Premier League millionaire managers thought of it.

“To be fair though, they all have sophisticated tactical analysis data and scouts and everything, so I’m sure they had their reasons for not doing the bleeding obvious.

“As good a decision Mourinho made, he also had the advantage of having managed Hazard for over two years recently – so he knows just how good he is.

“That’s not like the other managers who’ve probably only heard how good he is on Match of the Day and the fact he’s second favourite for PFA Player of the Year and so forth.”

Image courtesy of Chelsea Debs via Wikimedia Commons

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